Saturday, July 20, 2013

"Girl"- A bundle of Joy

Evan Grae Davis is a Documentary Filmmaker and Director of It's a Girl movie. His talk at the TEDx Gateway Mumbai inspired me a lot. For the first time I felt I should write about my thoughts on gendercide. For all the craft lovers who love my blog here is a post that is completely different, it is about great speakers and their riveting stories of inspiration.

Can you imagine a world without girls. No because some of the finest poetry would become meaningless plus the human population would eventually die.

The three words “It’s a girl!” are often received with sadness and disappointment because parents have a strong cultural preference for boys. There are many reasons why people prefer boys.But when you ask them why don't they want to have a girl child, common answers you will hear are:
Lot of dowry has to be given if a girl gets married.
A son will take care of elderly parents
A son has the right to perform some religious duties like lighting up the funeral pyre of dead parents which a girl can not do.
Men earn and support the family. More men means more income.

So people either abort foetus or kill a girl child as soon as she is born.This leads to gender imbalance which will soon turn into a big problem if it is not addressed now.  If gender inequality continues we might have to see days where people will give dowry in return to get a suitable daughter in law for their sons.Some families in India who believe abortion is equivalent to a crime wait patiently for a baby boy to arrive into their family no matter how many children they already have.

When I saw the TED talk of Evan Grae Davis. They showed a woman who killed 8 of her children just because they were girls. I dint see a hint of regret on her face though she has committed an act that is shameful, hurtful and violent.

I am the youngest one in my family and I came to know that my mother cried when she knew that I was born. I asked her why did she cry. She said she was expecting a boy. My mother got married at a very young age and she was ignorant.  I don't blame her because the society has influenced her to think that way. My parents provided me and my sister with quality education and here we are, all grown up, excelled in our academics and working in MNCs. Me and my sister have proved that when a girl child is provided with proper education she succeeds in every step of her life.

I just don't blame an individual or a family, it is the society that has to be blamed for gendercide in India. When I was little my father got a job transfer from a small village in south India to Hyderabad. Relatives suggested my father not to go to Hyderabad. However my father was very clear that we would move to Hyderabad for the sake our education. Closed ones said”You don't have a boy. You just have two girls. What is the need of providing quality education?”. If I was not bought up in Hyderabad I wouldn't have been writing this article, I wouldn't have known the power of Internet. I am thankful to my parents who have given us education and made us financially independent.

The practice of female foeticide is not only prevalent among rural  India but it is also prevalent among rich and educated families too. I have a small incident to share with you. My friend has been thinking to get married lately and submitted her profile in popular matrimonial sites. She is beautiful, educated and very talented. However few of them rejected her proposal just because she din’t have a brother. Others asked for more dowry because she din’t have a brother. You might find it silly but it is true. The reason is: In future when her parents turn old, she will have to take care of her parents. If she had a brother he would have taken care of their parents. When I met my friends mother she was in tears. She cursed herself for not having a son. She kept saying “I wish I had a son who would take our responsibility. What is the use of having daughters? In the end they will have a family of their own and her in-laws wont accept us in anyway. How will I get my second daughter married?”.

A girl is killed as soon as she is born or female foetus is aborted. Either a girl child is sexually abused or she becomes a victim of domestic violence. They are still found dumped in trash cans. I believe education is the key to resolve gendercide. Lack of education is the major cause for this problem. Let us unite to eradicate gendercide from earth.

Many people like Evan have worked selflessly and contributed to mankind with their work, I hope to see more such people and I want to be one of them.

You can listen to TED talk of Evan at;

You can also visit to know more about Evan's work.

You can visit for more such inspiring talks.

Franklin Templeton Investments partnered TEDx Gateway Mumbai in December 2012.


ARJUN MS said...

Its a serious problem in our society and it should be dealt with utmost care.

As you said education is the key, education can only uproot such an cruelty.

Hope your message reaches everywhere thus creating a change.